And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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