yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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