Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
