Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
