So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I need a beard to bite.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
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