happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
