We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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