Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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