Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize