I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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