North Korea, Best Korea!
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
