U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
