god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
