party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize