You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize