Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
