She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
