Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Damn victory sex feels great
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize