their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
