Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
