Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
