I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
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