a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
