He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
