Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
