i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
North Korea, Best Korea!
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Randomize
