Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Randomize
