waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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