So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
