im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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