Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
I queefed so loud it echoed.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
