I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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