Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
