I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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