I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize