Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Randomize