is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize