ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
