we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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