BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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