I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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