i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
