Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
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