You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize