definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
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