Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Randomize
