I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
