I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
