it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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