Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
