Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
