Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
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